19.6.11

Strange Dream.

I have gotten very little sleep today so,
After eating breakfast with my dad today,
I took a small nap.
I dreamed something strange...
It was horrible!

I dreamed it was back to my birthday, and i was having two parties. One of friday night, and one on saturday night. The Friday night party had been filled with a little over ten or fifteen close friends, cake was had, it was a good time.
My dream was about the saturday night party. It was cloudy out, and none of my friends were there yet. Cassie and Sarah were out of town. Sarah was at camp...Cassie was MIA haha. well, a dark green van arrived, and, though it had just rained, it drove crazily through my backyard and parked behind the blue shed. I thought it looked a lot like a kid's van i knew in band, but i wasn't really close to him. Then, a LOT of people i didn't know/like very well got out of the van. Wrestlers and preps. and they just started congregating and sitting and talking on my yard! I didn't invite any of them! Nobody i even invited was there yet! My mom wasn't understanding that i didn't want these people here and that this was a disaster! I ran inside the house and started cry, so my mom asked why i was crying? I told her i just needed to call me friend. I called sarah when i was upstairs alone, but after i told her what was going on she didn't answer so i figured she was just busy. I stoped crying and went downstairs, only to find my mom still not understanding why i didn't want people i didn't invite at my party! There were close to fourty poeple, that was a lot! Well a kid who looked like a short wrester i hate (but wasn't him because the 'real' him was on my lawn talking to friends) started talking to me, he was really nice and i felt bad for judging him because he was a wrestler. He carried me over to the group of popular people and my mom was saying 'you should take this opotunity to get to know these people!' and i did NOT want to. Then i saw a few people that i had actaully invited, so it wasn't as bad. I just kept having fits everywhere and crying because i didn't invite these people and i didn't even like them! Then, my mom called everyone inside our garage for ice cream cake. There were so many people, there wasn't going to be enough cake! I didn't invite these people! I was the last person to wander into the garage, i saw someone i INVITED and asked them how my make up was. They said it was ok. I took a chair in the back, expecting my mom to call me up to blow out the candles. Most people here hadn't even said HELLO to me, (maybe even EVER in the lives!) none-the-less happy birthday to me! Well, my mom didn't call me up. Candles were lit, and some other person standing up there next to the cake blew out my candles! I guess my mom figured that i didn't want to be at the party anymore. As they all joined in singing 'Happy Birthday' (To whom, may i ask?!?!?) i ran out of the garage, screaming in anger and frustration and crying very hard. I heard a girl say 'spoiled brat', and i went back in and wrongfully accused a nice girl who just graduated, but was kinda preppy, of saying it. "I didn't even invite you, ok? and you're calling me spoiled? This is suppose to be my party!" I was so mad! I ran out of the garage and across my front lawn and into the orchird as fast as i could. I ran to the corner and his in the weeds. I could hear them singing still. I opened my phone, and pressed the the 4 on my phone (speed dial for CJ, correct in realy life too!)
This is where i woke up, confused and worried that i had just cried in my dream (not in real life) for the past house basically.
What does this all mean, anyway?
I just feel so angsty after this dream...

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