I Just...

I know.
Everything revolves around me.
That's why i thought sn was mad at me.
Because she wouldnt' tell me waht was wrong.
So i thought it was just me.
You dont' call either.
You know i don't do anything anymore.
I spent all last night babysitting
And it'll probably be the highlight of my week(end).
At least sn asked if i wanted to go bowling.

I really miss having someone to tell everything to.
But most of all?
I miss haveing someone to tell anything to.
My mom suggested i get a boyfriend because i never go anywhere anymore.
At least then i'd do stuff and see people.

I know what you mean now.
I see you book it out of band everyday and i just want to cry everytime.
I started to cry a little last week when you did it one time.
I miss just having someone to talk to.
To listen to.
I'd give anything to have something.
I like you guys a lot.
But. you're to busy being together for me to hang out sometimes.

When i was a child i was better than my sister.
She couldnt' be alone for a few hours but i could last weeks without seeing friends or hanging out with people.
Now i can't do this anymore.
I need people to be happy.
Being alone drives me nuts.
Everyone you see me talk to is an attempt to have friends.
They'll never call to hang out,
But you used to.
I just hate using past tense on a frienship.
I'd try to not be self-centered just for you.
Just to have a friend.
To talk to.
Instead of a computer screen..