So.
Happy friggen Deciembre ya'll.
I don't know...
How i feel.
Today in the bandroom,
_ _ _ _ _ was there.
But..while i was walking in
And she was walking out,
I gave a half smile
I think she looked away.
Or at a friend.
I'm not scared anymore.
So that's good.
Just...it's almost weird.
I don't act different when
She's around.
But i'd rather not be near her.
For it's so ingraned into my
Head to be scared.
But..i'm not.
And, as always.
Nathanial.
Nathaniel.
Idk how i always spell it.
But, he's back to college
And won't talk to me anymore.
He's so...really?
I mean...it's fine but if he
Appears to need me so much
When he's home, then
Is fine at college...
I'm so GLAD i'm over that boy.
:P
Ohh....looked who i'm talking to now?
Mr. Nathaniel himself.
He's so sad so much.
And i'm in such a weird mood.
i don't know...
Friends don't tell me enough...
I don't share enough...
I feel distant...
Confused...
Cold...
A touch pissy (thats another story)...
The moon is out.
And school only was over
An hour ago....
And...school is going SO fast.
This is the fastest part.
Between Thanksgiving & Christmas.
Wow...life's ok though.
I'm still dreaming, but i don't remember.
Why do we do that?
Dream out things only to forget..
I don't understand.
It's that time where everyone becomes
Confused.
Distant.
Scared.
Alone.
Not again.
Not this year.
Last year i was all "Nathaniel".
Well, no more.
Pues, no mas. :)
Please tell me things.
Please love me.
Please care about me.
Please...don't forget me.
I..need..you..all..right..now..
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You need me as I need you :)
ReplyDelete_ _ _ _ _ doesn't like you still BTW, but she don't care about you either. No, I didn't ask or anyhting I just remember her saying something and me listening.
ReplyDeleteNot to sound mean or anything but it makes me wonder, if you are so over him, why do you talk about him so much?
Carolyn, we need to talk sometime, for the longest time you were 1 of few friends I'd actually tell stuff to. I miss ya!
BTW, just the other day I was doin something and it reminded me of you and I was like, "I should talk to Carolyn, I haven't talked to her in a while." I think I saw Zebra print...